Excerpt From My Life

Do you remember primary school? A time when everything was nice and sweet and good? Well, for me I don't know about that, because I can barely remember primary school. Standards (Grades) 1 through 5 are a blur to me. Literally almost no recollection. However I do remember certain key moments. Like the morning of writing SEA, or getting results. I remember the class, and some teachers. But other than that not much.

I also remember my best friend, and that's who this story is about. I guess I'm just feeling rather nostalgic right now so I'm going to take a trip down memory lane.

We were the best of friends, him and I. I was the weird child but for some strange reason he was my friend. In fact, even though I hung out with all the boy's from school (well most of them) it was only because they liked him and barely tolerated me.

I guess I was always quite the strange person, but we were in primary school. We didn't understand stereotypes and cliches, and who was richer and poorer and gender and sexuality was ground into one simple thought "girls were icky." A thought which I maintained for the rest of my life, btw.

Okay, so back to my bf. I can't remember his name, seriously I would change it if I did but I don't. So we'll call him Sean. Sean and I were inseparable. I remember once we were talking and I said something like "I have plenty boy friends" to which he gasped and I quickly corrected the sentence.

I had of course meant that I had more male friends than female friends but even at that young age we were taught that statements like that were "wrong." So Sean and I were inseparable and he was the nicest boy I've ever met. He tolerated me and all my little quirks. I was quite a weird child, okay I am a weird child, up until recently I was completely unable to tie my shoe laces. He would tie them for me. Day after day, whenever they got untied wherever we were, he would do it. Sweet, no?

I also remember that we naively had a "fight" over who's hand was marked first. See, you know there veins in your hand somehow form a letter? Like an 'M' well, both ours matched and we insisted that it was because we held hands so much. Ah, childhood. It was the most adorable thing ever. Completely innocent, we were children. All children are like this, but isn't it just sweet?

I don't remember much else, but I remember we played a lot of stupid games and had fun for no real reason. We were young, innocent and stupid. And then, suddenly the strangest thing happened. We'd always be in the same class, or at least the same grade and this solidified our "friendship." But Come standard four he was kept back in Standard 3, or kept back in 4 when we entered 5. I don't remember.

Either way, apparently since our friendship was no longer convenient he simply wasn't my friend anymore. He stopped being my friend, if he ever was, and simply taunted and ridiculed me. I don't remember if I did something to him, but I don't think that was it. Suddenly we were aware of our differences I was moving on and he was being left behind. Perhaps if I had been older I would had understood that and reached out to him, but then if I was older I would have been smart enough to never become friends with him.

So I was thinking about him today. What ever happened to him? My first best friend. Makes me crave a boyfriend for some strange reason. A boyfriend who will tie my shoes for me! Kidding, kidding. Seriously though, I don't know if to be happy or sad that we stopped being friends. I mean, it happened to me and almost everyone else from Primary school but he was...-sigh- I don't know. Seriously, he has all the markings to become one of those arrogant, brand name wearing, pretty boy, idiots that I don't like from school. So maybe it was for the best.

Maybe he was my imaginary friend...